Does your spouse only get “leftovers?”
TODAY’S PROVERB: Her husband’s heart trusts in her, and he lacks nothing valuable. She brings him good and not harm all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:11-12
I remember that “aha” moment — when I realized my husband’s heart didn’t trust me. It had nothing to do with fidelity in the typical understanding. It had to do with the “good” I brought him.
What I had brought him was “leftovers.” You know, what I had leftover from my day. My energy was being expended on my job, other family, my “me” time, friends, household chores — all those things came before Bob.
That moment happened after more than thirty years of marriage. Can you imagine? And Bob and I have had a good relationship by most standards.
But, it wasn’t all it could be. And it was out of order. When I had that revelation and began making changes to put Bob first, I discovered I had overextended myself. Thinking there was a lack of purpose in my life, I had added all these activities and people to fill the space that belonged to my hubby. That meant making some difficult choices and ultimately, difficult decisions.
We all have seasons in our life where our days are consumed by raising children, paying bills, taking care of parents, but when those seasons move on, making sure that we don’t fill those empty spaces with things other than building a relationship with our husband and our Heavenly Father is so important. Otherwise, we’re doing nothing more than adding wood, hay, and stubble to our lives.
I have wonderful friends. I love to write. I love to putter in our yard. But those things come after I bring my first to the Lord, and bring the good and valuable to my husband. Because I make those difficult decisions, our marriage is sweet and harmonious. We’re not perfect by any means, but if I have a choice whether to hang with Bob or anyone else — it’s Bob. And that’s a good thing.
May we bring our spouses the valuable and good, my friends.